How To Explain President Donald Trump

Can I tell you a secret?  Just between you and me.  Do you promise to keep it our little secret?  I’m so looking forward to Donald Trump becoming the next President of the United States of America.

Yes, you read that correctly.  I’m excited about Donald Trump becoming our next President.  And before you ask, I haven’t lost my mind nor am I Mr. Trump’s African American.

CHOOSING THE LESSER OF TWO INTESTINAL ISSUES

Truth be told, I’m not a fan of either party’s candidate.  When thinking about the choice to make in November, I feel sick to my stomach.  Our choices are just too limited.  And speaking of stomach ache, it’s like we are having to choose between “regular constipation” and “24/7/365 diarrhea”.

Deep down, my gut tells me that neither of the two primary candidates is the best this country has to offer.  It makes me sad knowing how extremely unlikely it is that the most extraordinary Americans will ever hold the office of the President.  The machinations of our political system have made becoming just about anything else in the world more attractive than becoming President.

WHO WOULD WANT THE JOB?

When I was a child it seemed that every child dreamt of being the President.  I doubt that even a small fraction of today’s children would want the job.  Who can blame our children either?  The future leaders know better; given the mockery we’ve made of everything political?

Who in their right mind would want the public hassle?  Who would want to have to sell their soul to corporations and special interest groups?  Who would want to try to keep account of all promises they know they will break or try to rationalize all the lies they have to tell day after day after day?  Apparently, Mrs. Clinton and Mr. Trump do!

FAMILY MEMBER WITH SOBRIETY ISSUES

America has for some time been the relative who has extreme sobriety issues but refuses to admit that their life is spiraling out of control.  Making matters worse is that we, the citizens of America, are the family members who deny that our relative is in dire need of help.

Like most families with a relative battling addiction, we, the citizens, too often justify America’s behavior.  Our inaction is akin to the excuses family members utter constantly when living in denial about the wellbeing of an addict.

“She only drinks on the weekend.”  “It’s only a little weed.”  “The children never see him inebriated.”  “He isn’t an addict he’s just going through some hard times.”  We are the classic enabler.

Under the guidance of Mrs. Clinton, America would continue the national farce as a functional addict.  However, if Donald Trump is able to take the seat behind the desk in the Oval Office, America will have to make that well known and overdue admission.  “Hello my name is America and I’m an addict…”

Then we’ll just have to cross our collective fingers and hope that America enters rehab and stays in rehab long enough to recover.

WE DESERVE DONALD TRUMP

So this is why I’m rooting for Donald Trump.  America deserves Donald Trump.  Mr. Trump is the mirror on the wall reflecting every blemish and wrinkle on the face of America.  Mr. Trump personifies and embodies everything about who we really are.

1. SHORT ATTENTION SPAN – The results of a recent research study show that humans have a shorter attention span than goldfish. Goldfish can remain focused for nine seconds.  Humans can only stay focused for eight seconds.

This sort of explains why Mr. Trump’s abbreviated messages are so effective and why Mrs. Clinton’s long-winded explanations are so ineffective.  The research makes it clear that it’s all Americans not only the children who can’t pay attention.  Excuse me!  What were we just talking about?

2. DIMINISHED LITERACY – There are twelve nations with higher literacy rates than America. All the while, the “greatest nation” in the world continues to profess its world supremacy despite overwhelming evidence that shows we are raising a nation of citizens who are unable to read beyond a 7^th or 8th-grade level.

With literacy levels so low, is there any wonder why so many people adore Mr. Trump’s eight second or shorter catchphrases like “Make America Great Again”, “See Spot Run”, “Build A Wall”, “Fun with Dick and Jane”, “Get Them Out“ and “The Cat in the Hat”?

3. NARCISSIST – Whether it’s true or not, most of the world believes Americans are narcissist.  The general opinion is that America is a nation comprised of one Donald Trump after another – 321 million people who are excessively self-interested, maintain overinflated egos, and who believe the world revolves around them.

If the world’s opinion about America is well founded, I doubt that even you are going to believe that we are a nation of narcissists.  I realize that you are also probably a narcissist so admitting that we are flawed will be next to impossible.  That’s why rather than just accepting my word watch what happens the next time a reporter asks Mr. Trump, our national narcissistic poster child, a question about any problem that needs solving.

Reporter, “Mr. Trump we have a problem…”  Mr. Trump, “I alone can solve any and every problem”; “I went to the Wharton School of Business; “I’m, like, a really smart person.”

COMPLETE AND UNINHIBITED ANARCHY

For the record, I’m not really looking forward to Mr. Trump becoming President.  I actually care far too much about the condition of the Nation that our children will inherit.  Nevertheless, it would be disingenuous of me, if I didn’t admit that having Donald Trump as the next Commander in Chief would be an anarchists’ dream come true.

While I have no idea who will win the Presidential election – Mrs. Clinton or Mr. Trump – I do know that America needs better choices than either of the two major party candidates.  I’ll say it again, our choices stink.

TIME TO TAKE A STAND

This Nation’s bad and limited presidential choice is precisely why it’s time for you and I to take a stand.  It’s time for you and I, the parents of America’s children, to play the ultimate role in the sustainability of the Republic.

It’s up to us to get serious about raising children who reverence enlightenment rather than entertainment, who place social consciousness far above social media, who value content of character over capitalism, who respect all humanity not just their homogenous group, and who would rather face the truth about this Nation than spend time on Facebook.  It’s up to us to raise extraordinary children who are willing, able, and fit to serve as President of the United States of America.  It’s also up to us to raise citizens who respect the Office of the President and who are committed to holding America to her self-evident truths.

The polls suggest that we might luck out this election – getting weekly constipation rather than terminal diarrhea.  Yet, if we don’t start to raise better children, children capable of serving and leading this nation expertly and selflessly; we won’t have anyone but ourselves to blame, when on that fateful election day, even the selection of the what we believe is lesser of two evils results in the end of world!

Would your child want to be President?  Have you talked to your child about the upcoming Presidential election?  Do you believe the two candidates are the best choices America has to offer?